Weekly Wednesday Wisdom: know when to walk away

Wisdom for Miloh: Know when to walk away...know when to run...know when to duck into a store and put a sweatshirt and hat on.

The first part of that comes from the Muppets...when some random dude sang a song called the Gambler...not sure what that guys first name was...hmmm.

Anyway while you may think it's about poker...it's really about life...(dude should have listened to that when he opened the chicken store.)

But let me give you a couple examples from my life:

Airport story 1

Walk away when you're wife says that if you go to jail in Hawaii she will still take her planned flight back.

You see your mom and I were once in Hawaii for your Aunt Jody and Uncle Ethan's wedding. 

On our way back to the mainland we had a stop over in Honolulu. That airport has a Wiki Wiki shuttle that takes you from terminal to terminal so you don't have to go through security again.

When we got off of our flight I asked the TSA guy where the Wiki Wiki to the terminal was. He pointed to the stairs that were behind a sign that said something like if you cross the red mark (top of the first stair) you can't go back.

So I said to the guy that it wasn't the right way, that I didn't want to go through security because I just wanted to go to my next terminal. 

The guy kept pointing at the stairs and told me to go down...there was a bit of back and forth...then we started toward the stairs. We passed the sign BUT HAD NOT PASSED THE RED LINE AT THE TOP OF THE STAIRS and I turned again and asked the guy if this is really the way to the Wiki Wiki to the terminal. 

Then he said something like, oh...no that's this way (points opposite direction) but you can't go there because you passed the sign. 

Let me set the stage for you NO OTHER PEOPLE had been near us when we were chatting. He had his eyes on us the whole time and I had 10 rolls of high speed film that were a pain in the ass to get through security...plus those lines suck...plus I was right in the first place.

That's when I may have argued with the guy a bit. I said how he was the one to tell us to go past the sign...he didn't care.

I told him that we hadn't gone past the aforementioned red line...he didn't care.

Next I may have called him an idiot. Then I may have called him a fucking idiot. Then I may have called him a fucking idiot. Then I might have said he was so stupid he couldn't think on his own. Then I may have called him a fucking idiot.

Then he may have told me he was going to arrest me. I may have called him a plain old idiot next.

Then your mom passed the red line said she had my license and would leave me in a Honolulu jail if I didn't go with her....I followed her.

Appendix: We went through security. It was fast-ish because they opened a new line right in front of us. As we were walking to our gate (the first guy knew the number because I said that's where we were going) a security guy who was on break smoking saw me...looked straight in my eyes...put his cigarette down and followed me. Which is when I ducked into a show, put a sweatshirt and hat on and almost shit my pants. I then laid low for 40 minutes at a different gate and got on the plane no problem.

Notice I didn't shit my pants...something you do often these days Miloh.

Airport story 2
Walk away if your mom and about 15 other people tell you to.

A few years later your mom and I were in LA...I was there to photograph Shaun White at the X-games, then we had a wedding we went to and late we saw Aunt Jody and Uncle Ethan...I am now seeing a theme and now who to blame.

On our way back to Minneapolis I was wearing a zip up track jacket.

As I was about to go through the airport security metal detector I asked the TSA guy on the other side if I had to take it off...it was slim fit so really I should have had to...but it was the rules and I always follow rules so I asked.

TSA guy said yes so I took it off turned to your mom, who was at the conveyor belt and threw my jacket at her to put through. 

Your mom asked what was up. I said "nothing...it's stupid."

That's when TSA guy came trough the metal detector and got so close that his nose was about 5 inches from mine. He said something like "do we have a problem here?"

I said "are you kidding?" because honestly I thought he was kidding...and then he said something again like "do you have a problem with me?" 

I was blown away and told him that no, I had no problem with him, that I asked him if I should take the jacket of. I followed his direction, threw it to my wife and said something to her.

I don't remember what he said next but he kind of kept saying the same thing...and we had the same exchange a couple times...then he asked if we needed to go to the back. 

That's when, of course, I said proudly "Yes I do." I said it because they have so many cameras and such that if they looked at tape and listened to audio they would know the guy was an ass.

And then I heard gasps from other people around me and your mom...they all told me to apologize and go through. But the point is I did nothing wrong and there was no reason I wanted this guy to think he broke me. 

He wasn't expecting that answer and asked again...do I really want to go to the back room? I laughed a bit and said yeah and that I thought it was a good idea.

Then your mom walked through a different metal detector and EVERYONE told me to not be stupid and walk through.

The guy offered me one more chance...your mom and everyone was looking at me hoping I'd walk through...I did.

To be honest in both cases I'm a little bummed I backed down. I did nothing wrong in either case...in fact in both the TSA person was wrong...but in the end I really didn't want to deal with all the hassle of TSA and such interrogating me...and I have never been in jail and would like to keep it that way.

So yeah, little dude...know when to walk away. And maybe you should also watch your mom when we are at the airport...she's a much better role model than I.

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Ladies and gentlemen...Kenny Rogers.

I think you'd never see this on a kids show these days because it mentions whiskey and cigarettes...sometimes protecting children really just keeps them from experiencing good things.

Ah...either way I hope the Muppets get a show again...they have a You Tube channel with new stuff so there is hope.