smonk you: the best freaking daddy blog ever

Originally posted on Dad Camp Until 5 years ago all but a few fathers I knew were 30 or more years older than me. That’s because the simple fact that most of my friends had no kids so the only fathers I knew were their parents. Since those fathers were 60 plus and I was 30ish I didn’t put myself in the same category as them. When we’re young we have a crazy concept of age. For instance when I went to day camp I thought all my counselors were about 30. I realized I was wrong when I was a counselor there at 15. But that warped sense of age stuck with me when it came to fathers. In my head since I am so much younger than the fathers I know, I can’t be one myself. Maybe it was a really simple way to look at things but it was keeping me from putting myself in the category of father. I knew I wanted a kid one day but it just seemed so far away. To add to my mental block of fatherhood, I thought of myself as just a normal guy. My conversations with other guys were about things like s...

An unexpected side affect of writing this blog is that I was introduced to the world of baby blogs. Totally didn't expect it, but since most of my readers are pregnant women or moms it makes sense. There is some great stuff out there. One of the blogs I'm digging is the818.com by Morgan. Great, real look at pregnancy with some cool design stuff too. She does a weekly update on what's going on with her and her pregnancy. All those questions that folks would ask. But since men aren't the ones doing the hard work no one asks us what's up with us. I thought it would be fun to answer her update questions from a male point of view. So here goes: How far along? Officially 22 weeks and 4 days, but since I know a little more about math and the female body than every doctor I know that it's really closer to 20. Total weight gain/loss: Down 3 pounds...sorry. Stretch marks? I always had these little ones on my ankles...I think they are from when I grew to...

Thanks to the geniuses who made this changing station I learned not to let a baby fall and hit it's head on a disgusting airport bathroom floor. One lesson down...many more to go.

Bad things happen to our animals when Staci is out of town. Once, before her plane hit the ground to her destination, a whole opened 50lb bag of food fell down our stairs. 50lbs of kibble all over, not a fun thing to pick up. The next time Kalli got some broken skin from playing at the park. Nothing to bad. Third time was a charm, Kalli was again accidently scratched at the park. This time it was bad. Huge open wound that led to $400 at the vet. Then when I left for lunch one day I trusted Kalli because she wasn't picking at her stitches, when I got back her wounds were barely still closed up. Then when Staci got home she noticed that our cat Zoggs had no fur on his ear, I hadn't even noticed. He's got food allergies and I think he at some flowers we had out. This time, when I had been home for literally 1 minute Kalli yelp in pain. I thought I had stepped on her leg. Luckily she was just being dramatic because she tripped over a cat toy. From the sound I thought...

The Bump is running a blog contest. If you're a fan of this blog please click on the image below and nominate me under the daddy blog category. Thanks.

I was super psyched to find this online. I haven't seen one in person, but that doesn't really matter. The Eames Elephant is super new, it was first produced by Vitra in March 2009, and super old, it was designed by Charles & Ray Eames in 1945. I'm a huge fan Eames's design, so simple, so beautiful, so classic and so comfy. Their molded plywood chair , sometimes called chip chair, is my fave. You wouldn't think it but it's super comfy to sit in. I wouldn't really do them justice in this post so check their wikipedia page if you're not familiar. Any way in 1945 Ray & Charles Eames created 2 plywood elephants of molded wood. They were never mass produced. This year Vitra recreated the elephant in plastic and in 5 matte finishes. It can be a chair, a toy or just a friend to your little one. Read more at the Vitra site, they have more great images, or head to Design Public to pick one up. And to my family, I really want this so just p...

Yesterday I went to Little Tel Aviv, one of my favorite places to get Falafel in Minneapolis. If you live in the cities and haven't been there check them out. Super good falafel (Israeli so it's greener because of more parsley), their french fries are freaking awesome and the hot sauce rocks. While there a soda caught my eye. It's called Malt Star. I asked what it tasted like and the owner dude said it was sweet. So when I ordered I was thinking it was gonna be a cola-ish thing. At first sip I thought it was disgusting because it wasn't what I was thinking it would be. But once I was able to make the shift in my brain I actually loved it, and so did Staci. I can best explain it as the soda that Guinness would make if it made a soda. It has that bitter stout flavor with the a bit of sweetness. And although it doesn't taste it, it's non-alcoholic. The guy also told us that it would be good for Staci once we have the kid, because it promotes milk production ...

People said I'd lose my fear of children as the pregnancy goes along. I'm proud to say that I have proved them wrong. Yesterday there was a kid in my office and I walked the other way so I wouldn't have to meet it. And before I go on I want to stress, again, that I'm super psyched that we're having a kid and psyched for this pre-kid to come out. I'm not sure what the deal is but kids really do freak me out. There are a handful out there that I feel comfortable around, and yes if I know you I'm of course talking about your kid. But most scare me. At the risk of sounding like an ass for comparing my pre-kid to a dog, I think I'll try a little analogy. I was never a dog person. I didn't really know how to interact with them. I was also a believer of the 'master is a slave' thing because you have to pick up their poo. But a few years ago we got a dog, and I love her. Plus she opened me up to liking other dogs. And while I don't li...

At some point we'll be teaching our baby to read. So the alphabet will probably be an integral part in that. I found some cool posters and prints of alphabets so I thought I'd share. Some are limited additions and may no longer be available, but they are all good eye candy. by Sigrid Martinez available on Laffiche Moderne by Burlesque Design scroll down a bunch by Eléonore Thuillier available on Laffiche Moderne   by Lorena Siminovich ( petitcollage on etsy ) by Aaron Hogg on Threadless by Jessica Hische This one is actually a name poster by Jennifer Ramos aka Made By Girl As a little aside, since our child will be in the Montessori environment it will learn cursive before regular. There are a bunch of reasons that they start with it, including it being more natural, the circles and such are mirror the way children draw and it helps them see the contrast in upper and lower case. I'll probably talk more about that when our child is doing that ...

Number 1 Here's one to file under things not to say. Yesterday I was talking to the pre-kid, it's cool because he/she actually moves around when I talk. Well I was telling it that it has it easy now. That it's basically just hanging out in a bath for 9 months. Then I said it's present living quarters are super luxurious because it is, in ratio, bigger than what a bath will be once it's born. First off, not sure what I was thinking because the size relationship was wrong. Second, Staci was obviously there at the time and did not like my comparison of her size to a bath tub. For the record she looks great right now. Number 2 My recent post about (not) finding out what gender our kid is was republished on Dad Camp . It's a nice new site that has postings about fatherhood that are pretty universal. It's not the cliche dad stuff you see out there. So check them out if you're a dad, gonna be a dad or know a dad. Number 3 If you like this blog plea...

This is one of those baby furniture pieces that you're not embarrassed to have out when friends come over. Bloom's coco lounger comes in a lot of color options. It is self rocking, light weight and could hold up to 26lbs (I just looked weight by baby age and realized that could be anywhere from 1-2 years old in case you didn't know.) Each single-piece frame comes in two material styles; patented stylewood (in natural or cappuccino ), which from what I can tell is Bloom's fancy word for bent wood, and plexistyle (in clear , ebony or ivory), which is their fancy word for bent plexi. The seat pads come in 9 color options and have a 5 point safety harness to keep your little one snug. Other cool features are that like all of Bloom's products the coco loungers are made from sustainable materials lead free bpa free phthalate free PVC free heavy metal free AZO dye free Sadly the coco lounger will not have a place in our home. A friend gave us their Jacad...

It was a friend of mine's birthday and a bunch of us went out for lunch. I had a shot or two. They gave me the liquid courage to go talk to the girl that I liked at work. That girl was Staci. And here we are 9 years later expecting our first (and probably only) kid in January.

Preggie Pops are a scam...that's my opinion. You get seven lollipops for 4 to 7 dollars. They come in flavors like ginger, peppermint and lavender that may help with nausea, but our doctor and nurses said Dum-Dums are just as good. Plus Dum-Dums have that mystery flavor and cost so much less. Soy and Rice milk boxes say something like 'not suitable for use as baby formula.' I understand why, people are stupid. However other beverages like Mountain Dew do not carry that warning, and some people are very stupid. Don't sit at your wife's feet at doctor appointments. The doc or nurse will ask you to move. I have made this mistake all 3 appointments I've gone to. When you first feel the pre-kid kick it's super light but cool. The first time you feel it flip around or turn is freaky. Giraffes are the most gender neutral animal out there...as far as clothes go. Owls seem to be a close second. Hippos and monkeys are for boys while pigs and birds are for girl...

I found this bottle  on a recent trip to a little one's clothing store. I say litttle one because I'm not really sure what to call a store that offers clothes from newborn to 3, or maybe older. I also can't figure out how sizing on kids clothes work. I understand the month thing but no kid I've ever met wears the month that they are. Then to make myself seems even stupider I don't know what ages you use use various names for kids. I.e baby, infant, or toddler. But I digress. We were in this store for some age of kids and the clean look of the bottle popped out at me. I just took a glance and moved on when I saw that it's stainless steel. You see at home we have a wonderful collection of stainless steel and aluminum water bottles and travel mugs. All say they are handwash only and so I rarely use them because I'm not always into getting coffee and tea stains out by hand. I'm sure the world wouldn't end if they went in the dishwasher, but I'...

We live in a row house without a basement so storage space is at a minimum. That's why the room which will soon be the baby room was a freaking mess a month ago. It started out as our office but it was too sparse. Then it slowly became a catch all for everything we didn't want to organize or weren't committed to sell or donate. It was never included in the tour of our house. But finally after a bunch of trips to Good Will, a couple sales on Craigslist and 2 weeks of organizing we finally cleared out the room. Okay there are a couple things in there but they are baby related. Now we need to find the perfect shade of white and start painting. We're going with white because it makes the room really clean and any art we add will pop. We found a site called Modern Nursery . They offer some really well designed furniture, decor and gear. The furniture is simple/Swiss style so if you're into that check them out. That's where we picked up this tree wall sticker . Once w...

As I said in my earlier post Staci was able to weasel her way into getting an ultrasound a week early so we could find out the gender of the baby. Staci made up a card that we gave to the nurse running the ultrasound. It had 2 boxes on it. One with boy after it, the other with girl. We told the nurse that instead of telling us what it was we'd like her to mark it on the card and put it in an envelope. Then Staci and I would go out for a nice lunch and open the card together and reveal the surprise. Again our pre-kid was flipping around like crazy. We saw a good heartbeat (150 bpm) and the hearts 4 chambers looked great. The head, abdomen, sacrum and all that stuff measured perfectly. We were able to see all it's leg and arm bones, which was pretty cool. Then came time for the nurse to find out what we were having. Staci and I closed our eyes while the nurse did her magic. After 20 minutes she printed this picture out. It is of crossed legs. The pre-kid was in a position that m...

Everyone asks the obligatory question of what we want to have, a boy or girl. I think about 80% of the people care what the answer is. The other 20% want the answer to be 'I don't care as long as it's healthy.' In fact a couple I've have been chastised, and lectured about my answer when it wasn't healthy. And that really pisses me off because that wasn't the question. I've never been asked 'would you rather have a healthy kid or would you rather pick the sex' because that's really what you're asking if the answer should be healthy. And let's say the baby isn't healthy. It's still going to be a boy or girl, right. So shouldn't I still be able to have a preference. And as I said before I don't really care as long as it snowboards. I lean a bit towards boy because I love the name we picked for a boy. Plus I really don't get little girl clothes, tights, frilly dresses etc. If it's a girl I'd be excite...

I call it half-assed because I'm not sure if a bowl really fits into the category of gear, but this bowl is cool. And yeah it's probably way to early to be thinking about this for a kid but I may but a couple just to have a set now because technically I think adults can use it. When I was making a living as a photographer I had the displeasure of having to do a shoot with a bowl of cereal in it. There was no glue used instead of milk, but there were however some milk splashes made of porcelain. I'm not sure exactly what each splash cost but I'm guessing about $75-100. Whatever it is the prop stylist was not happy when he dropped one and it shattered. The Spilt Milk bowl by Fred & Friends gives you the look of the milk splash without the fear of a broken bowl. Made silicone you can drop it, bend it or whatever and you won't ruin the bowl. Fred & Friends also has come other great stuff for kids like the Food Face plate and some things that are great but not ...

Lately I have no freaking concept of dates and the Gregorian calendar in general...in fact I almost wrote Roman calendar and maybe that's the problem. I could be 2 calendars behind.  I've been screwing friends over left and right by not knowing what week is what and ruining plans. I'm totally confused on which week I have a photoshoot even though I know the date. For some reason right now my brain can't process time. The good thing is I think it's the late Labor day that's fucking with me as this week is the one that has been forgotten and such. Or it could be some sort of thing like Desmond from lost where he jumped through time. That would be awesome if somehow I can find out what the website I'm designing will look like, but it's unlikely that will happen. Or maybe my brain is leaking brain cells. Maybe my years of not doing drugs and not binge drinking has caught up with me. My brain is doing a literal brain dump. But then there is a thing called Pre...

Yesterday I turned 36 so I decided to tweet 36 things that I saw or did last year that inspired me. I decided I'd put them all together here. I would have done it yesterday but I needed to install a new router...long freaking story but I had to install from my wife's old Windows laptop, and it's a fact that Windows machines suck...they really do...so it took an hour. Anyway here are 36 things that inspired me, or made me smile, last year in no particular order: 1. My new mode of transportation , that Staci got me when I got my new job. 2 and 3. JJ Abrams's issue of Wired and his Mystery Box speech at Ted. 4. A clock I can't afford. 5. Stubby , the Iguana I photographed in St. Thomas. 6. Discovering that I'm on Hulu in the episode of Bathtastic! , hosted by Matt Muenster, Staci and I were on. It's also on DIY network where you can catch all new episodes and even see Matt in an episode of blog cabin. It's not a shameless plug if it's for a friend, ...